Here's how I stand. I have a fixed male deity that has been my patron for close to fifteen years now, give or take a few. I am happy with Hermes, adore him, love the relationship I have with him, and am grateful for his presence. However, recently I've wanted to have a more female side to things too (though to be fair, Hermes does encompass the balance of male and female in his being), so I have been searching for a goddess to also devote myself to. I tried Hathor for quite some time, but as of late, she and I have parted ways amicably due to many reasons I acknowledge, and reasons I'm not sure of at this time. We are just not compatible, though I still love all she stands for and what she can give.
I have been poking around names of deities in the Roman/Britain/Gallic areas, and have settled (for now, at any rate) on Belisama (also known as Belisma). The problem is, there is very, very little information about her. My friend Kim, a follower of Epona, says that with a lot of Gallic deities, you have to go to the source; ie: reading articles from the area, which in Belisama's case could definitely mean the Liverpool area of England, though she was known all over Gaul. I don't know how to properly go about searching for truly academic things like my friend does. I don't know that I have the mental stamina to do so, or the resources. All I know is that she seems to be calling me to her... or perhaps to her to guide me toward another goddess.
Question Cluster 1 is:
How does one really know an obscure deity who has the most basic of things known about her? For example, she's known to be a goddess of light, fire, crafts, the forge, etc. Kim tells me to meditate and listen to see if Belisama speaks to me, but will that really be enough? How do I know it's her talking to me, and not someone else? How do I know that it's not me just making junk up about her? Hermes is easy-- there's a lot of information and hymns out there about him, from Ovid to basic myths. He's got a very prominent personality. He's -there- for me, in my head, in my heart. He's not obscure. So. What do I do?
Question 2 is:
There's another goddess that I was interested in a while back and still am. Her name is Sequana, and she's a tutelary goddess... of the river Seine. I'm in North Carolina, in the States. Would devoting oneself to a goddess that is a goddess of one specific area, of one specific body of water, be a good idea? Would she be a relevant goddess? I believe that if a goddess or god of one country or another calls to you, even if you're not of that country, you should go for them. I'm not Greek, but Hermes works for me. But a deity that holds sway over one river, or one mountain, or one desert... It seems too specific to me, like I am barking up the wrong tree.
Thoughts on that?
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