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Is there a finite amount of energy in the universe? That is, does all energy already exist and it just gets moved around? Or can energy be created or raised out of nowhere? When I raise energy, where is it supposed to be coming from? Am I drawing it from within my body, or am I creating it by my will? Or am I drawing it from the air/earth around me? Or do I borrow it or ask it as a gift from other entities/deities around me?
Also, I'm a little confused about the idea of negative and positive energy. Instinctively it makes more sense to me that energy just is itself, neither negative nor positive, and the only difference is a lack of energy or an abundance of energy.
Another thing: I'm getting the feeling like my energy is "sticky". I have started my little energy exercises by rubbing my hands together, because the physical sensation helps put me in the right mindset, and helps me cease all the usual mental tangents and meanderings. Once I separate my hands to try and form an energy ball between them, I get the feeling that I'm just stretching the energy out between my hands as if the energy is some kind of taffy stuck to my hands. It's hard to get it into a ball when it just wants to stick to my hands. Does anyone have any insight or advice about this?
Finally, I also have a few questions about grounding. Grounding feels very natural to me when I'm lying down. Is this unusual, or does anyone know any reason this posture might be unhelpful? It feels good to me, in part because I have slight back pain and the only time I can't feel it is when I'm lying on my back, but also because it just feels right. Also, from what I've read, grounding involves an interaction with the earth's energies (sending negative/excess energies into the earth and/or drawing energy up from the earth). This question might sound weird, but is there anything the earth wants in return for using her energies in this way? I sounds a bit like taking advantage of the earth's energies, and I want to be respectful and have a reciprocate relationship with her.
I know this is a lot of random questions, but if anyone has any advice or answers or links to good resources, I would greatly appreciate it! I have pretty good judgment on internet sources in fields I'm familiar with, but this whole pagan/magick/energy realm is still very unfamiliar to me and I don't always know who to believe. Thanks!
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