Okay, let me start by saying I am one of those people who has mostly subscribed to the whole poly-but-monotheistic approach. That many different Gods/Goddesses are all personifications of a 'The' God/Goddess which is the personification of Divinity as I choose to call it. I'm not saying this is 'right' or 'wrong', I'm not saying anything really, just that is the way I have seen things for a long time. It kind of helps because I am the type of person who likes to mix and match sometimes, so if a specific God/Goddess matches my purpose I appeal the Him/Her. I don't know if I will one day change this approach of not though.
I have for a long time, since I first started learning about witchcraft/paganism about 7 years ago, wanted to find a patron God/Goddess, or at least a group of deities to worship specifically. I found myself always most drawn to the Celtic Pantheon. But for some reason these deities always feel more abstract to me then the Greek Gods/Goddesses.
Most of all, though, I have always felt a pull towards The Morrigan. Honestly this scared me a little at first. I was coming from a Christian background, and my only references at that stage were SRW and other such fluffy information from the internet. So the idea that I could be most drawn to a Dark Goddess kinda freaked me out a little bit. So I pulled back I guess you could say, and I held off for a long time on forming any kind of bond with a specific deity. But now I find again, once I am a little more mature about things, that I lack, miss a relationship with Gods/Goddesses. And The Morrigan is still there in the back of my mind it seems, but I worry that maybe I have waited too long...
I worship nature, in my own way I guess, some days I just feel a pulse in the air, and there is life all around and I just feel surrounded by 'the magic of the earth' (sorry if that makes me sound incredibly childish).
So now to may actual question: What do I do? How does one find what deities would suit you best, and how does one make contact with them? I have tried asking whatever Gods/Goddesses I am meant to reach to contact me in my dreams, but I have not had any dream that could be taken as a message of sign. I am only now trying to learn to relax, never even mind meditation, it is probably one of the hardest things I find, so my attempts at contacting them through that have been non-existent.
Please could someone help me? I just need a bit of advice.
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