I have a question for people who are well-versed in some form of the craft. I'm having difficulty even trying to phrase what I'm getting at correctly, so please bear with me.
Let me start out by telling you a dream. It was a completely normal dream; I don't think there was anything supernatural about it --- but it illustrates the point I'm getting at well. I had sleep paralysis, which I have fairly often. In this particular dream, the sleep paralysis was blamed on Lilith, who was supposedly levitating me off of my bed. My first thought was, "I should become a witch! Then if something like this happens again, I'll actually understand what is going on and how to deal with it." Then my immediate next thought was, "No, that's a terrible idea; if I were a witch then I'd have to acknowledge terrifying situations like this instead of ignoring them."
When I woke up, I realized that that's pretty much an accurate picture of my feelings about the craft. First, I get interested in it, and go, "Ooh, that looks shiny, I should investigate more." Then I decide that I find the whole idea very frightening and that I want nothing to do with it. Then I think that perhaps it's something I should learn specifically because I find it frightening --- i.e. overcoming fears by demystifying them.
I can never make up my mind as to whether I have any interest in witchcraft or not, and I guess I'd really appreciate it if someone who does have experience in it could tell me what parts of my thought process seem reasonable/realistic and what parts don't.
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