Monday, July 09, 2012

Coming out of Fallow Times

So I've been absent from the boards for a few months, and I'm not sure if the depression or the fallow period came first, but they formed a perfect storm of apathy and anxiety that's kept me from spending any energy on spiritual things until about last week. It was deeply unpleasant and I'm glad it seems to be over.

I have to say, reading several of TC's members' blogs on the subject really helped me frame my thoughts in a way to help myself stop worrying so much and realize that I'm not alone in this, and it might just be a cyclical thing that happens sometimes, and, most importantly, that it doesn't last forever. Thank you all, so much.

The question pestering me now is this: How do I get back into something resembling a spiritual practice? I feel like I should be doing this by degrees, and not going fast and furious with offerings now that (what seems to have been) a long intense Deity getting-to-know-you period is over. I'm certain They aren't completely absent from my life; even when I could only focus on having enough energy to go to work and numbing my brain with tumblr, I kept getting words and ideas like "self-care" and "mindfulness" thrown at me from all corners.

Still, I feel guilty about lapsed offerings and missed holidays, and I'm wondering if I should make up for that in some way with ritual, or focus on getting myself back up to optimal performance before I start doing Deity work again.

Those of you who've dealt with Fallow Times before, what's helped you the most in re-engaging with spiritual life?

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